Bob Marley is Jammin’

Stories about photocopy machines:

“Scanner bulbs used to be made with halogen, which gives off heat. Today, manufacturers use xenon, which remains cool. A customer with a halogen-bulb scanner called about constant jamming in the document feeder.

The problem was perplexing, but we finally got the customer to admit that one of his employees liked to warm up his doughnuts on the copier glass. Turns out the film from the glazed doughnuts was making it impossible for the feeder to run documents over the glass. Once we cleaned that up, everything worked just fine. But we did wonder where all the photocopies of the doughnuts ended up.”

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Someone taped a photo of himself to the lid of the photocopier and every time a copy was made the person’s picture appeared in the copy unbeknownst to the person making the copy.

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Sign on printer:

This printer is named Bob Marley because it is always jammin’.

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This note was taped to the front of the printer:

This printer is equipped with Xerox’s VoiceOver technology.

Using voiceover is easy.

1. stand close to the printer
2. simply speak one of the following simple commands:
    a. print
    b. scan
    c. copy
3. You may also speak additional commands:

    a. print five copies
    b. print five copies double sided
    c. copy this two times on legal paper

*Note: The Learning Module is currently running so you may need to repeat your command very loudly multiple times, until the copier understands. This is only temporary while the printer gathers localized accents and language information.

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The new copy machine was installed and the finance department had them set the machine to double sided copies to save money, but didn’t tell anyone. Everyone wasted reams of paper reprinting everything. Because that was the default, and people would forget, they’d have to reprint multiple times wasting more paper than they ever would have printing single side copies.

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No one was allowed to take paper from the copy room because the copy center counted every piece of paper that was taken out of the reams of paper and charged for it as if it was a copy. So, too bad about you if you just needed a plain piece of paper to write on. And there is a built in counter on the copy machine for what reason?

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The copy machine was so old that it broke down every week and it took the repairman a week to fix it. When asked why we couldn’t get a new copy machine, we were told that it was too expensive to replace it. To save money they discontinued the maintenance agreement. We had to walk to the next floor every time we needed a copy or to print from our computer, wasting valuable time and company dollars.

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Today’s gift was to offer my old copy machine on Freecycle. I just bought a color copier, fax and printer. I wanted to offer it to someone who may need it. It works well so they won’t be naming this great copy machine Bob Marley.

In Giving,

Robin